Ugh, it all sounds so trite. Stupid emotions, failing at originality, producing only platitudes....no matter how true they are.
Still, I do feel like not much good has come from this blog. I thought it would make me feel less alone, but despite this opportunity to purge stupid thoughts, I still feel about as odd, misunderstood, unable to relate and connect as ever. There is only one thing that this blog produced, but if that friendship lasts I suppose that's more than one has any right to expect from a blog.
Blargh and fuck corporate restaurants.
P.S. Oh I remember what I was sort of going to write. I just watched the Social Network and seemed to relate to the autistic-like main character to a stupid extent. It also reminded me that I've done nothing with my life and I wish I was cool enough to be in stupid secret clubs and know influential people, but despite no longer working on a farm I am still very much a peasant. If achieving shit is being in the right place at the right time, then I'm screwed because I never go anywhere and I'm always late. Fuck okcupid, too.
Crap, I keep forgetting the whole "Fake it 'til you make it" strategy.
ReplyDeleteThere was a brilliant second comment on this post, but I deleted because no one upstages me on my blog!
ReplyDeleteI try to send you as much mail as I possibly can. Should I start sending junk mail with comments, perhaps ads for the upcoming consumerism obsession? Sometimes I wonder if I've sent too much.
ReplyDeleteI think that you should do something a bit more engaging before you go to gad school. Work in the service industry where you will have forced interaction on a daily basis, no? Something pointless. Non career oriented, is what I'm getting at.
PS. The people want to know what this brilliant comment was. Please paraphrase. Also, do not delete these comments, as they are not brilliant.
ReplyDeleteHahaha, well the brilliant comment was from someone I like a lot, who prefers to stay anonymous, about the struggles of wanting to be extraordinary and feeling ordinary or worse.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I love your mail. I shall send you something soon, but I do yet know what. Suggestions?
Spy club = needed. Funnily enough, whenever I feel like I need to be doing more with my life it's often b/c I'm thinking of how you got that awesome teaching job and a worldly thing what with living in New York and traveling to distant lands. I think you are living the life.
ReplyDeleteI think I am trying to make it look like I'm living the life, in a typical "fake it 'til you make it" approach. It's not the worst thing to try that, and certainly better than nothing. But I can't be living the life until I'm not living in some sort of a socially inept bubble.
ReplyDeleteI wish you were here.