The following was a draft saved from a couple of years ago (it had relevant images then). Funny how things change and then change back:

I don't think I am myself any more. Well, that's a logically faulty statement, huh? Self-contradicting or something. I suppose I mean that I do not think I am who I used to think I was. I feel that I am changing. I suppose any amateur scientist could tell you that no one is the same person at any point (can't walk into the same river twice, says Pocahontas) but I believe I am undergoing some sort of a rapid transformation. Perhaps I may refer to it as a metamorphosis. Perhaps I already did... twice.
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Coincidentally, I am not becoming a bug. I am remaining human. In fact, if my imaginary calculations are correct, I am becoming more human than ever. This tremendous accomplishment is brought to you by no longer giving a shit about people's feelings. At least not as much. I am no longer trying to be a really good person. Being a good person not only sucks, it rarely benefits anyone. All the time I spend trying to be selfless I am only making things worse. Enough. People are meant to be selfish. It is nature and I must embrace it, like monkeys embrace poo flinging (remember Gunther and how he was much happier as a monkey of moderate intelligence?). These may be the characteristics of my metamorphosis. To be clear, I am not claiming to have been selfless - only that I tried (and indeed aspired) to be a decent person with other people's needs in mind. I think what Kellie suggested was right - it's much more effective if everyone worries about their own needs and happiness. Don't be an asshole, but don't try to be a martyr either -it's fatalistic.
So, revealing the new me. And just to show that I am not completely self-absorbed, I will offer you an apple.[Image]
Eat it![Image]
Ahahahahahahahahah[Image]
All your Base are Belong to US!